Breakups can be incredibly difficult, but Laverne Cox is focusing on the positive in the midst of heartbreak, and using her time to hopefully inspire her followers. After two years of dating, the Orange is the New Black star announced that she and her boyfriend, Kyle Draper have split, but Cox explained in her breakup post that she wants the trans community to find "hope" in the relationship, despite the fact that the couple have mutually decided to part ways.
According to Us Weekly, Cox shared the sad news on Instagram on Tuesday, June 25, alongside an adorable video of the pair celebrating their love at an event earlier this year. "After much soul searching and tears from both of us, we have decided it’s time for us to go our separate ways," Cox began her post, explaining that she and her record label CEO beau "decided we should make a public statement since our relationship was public in ways neither of us anticipated."
While the actor and activist noted that the decision to break up was an incredibly emotional one, Cox explained that she wanted her fans and followers to see their relationship as inspiring rather than focusing on the heartbreak. "We know our relationship meant so much to so many people, especially trans folks, giving them hope that this kind of love is possible for them as well. That hope, the hope for love has not waned for me in the face of this breakup but rather is fortified," she wrote.
"Knowing that we are both capable of giving and receiving love with this level of kindness, respect, trust, affection, depth, and intensity has been so healing and life affirming for us both," Cox continued in her post. "I am so grateful we were open to love and for every moment we had together. We have both grown in innumerable ways as a result."
The actor ended her announcement by explaining that she and Draper "both want a breakup that honors and respects the quality of our relationship and the love we shared," which the businessman underlined by commenting on Cox’s post with a red heart emoji. "I love you!" he wrote.
Cox and Draper met on Tinder, the actor confessed to People in April 2018, adding that she had been planning to delete the dating app right before they matched. "It’s really dumb luck that we met and clicked," she said at the time. "I like to be in the moment and not think the future, and [right now] I’m very grateful that I get to experience this. It’s so deeply connecting. It’s just a full spiritual experience. … I’ve never felt a man as all-in as he is."
Cox has been incredibly open about the struggles of dating as an openly trans woman in the past, telling Self in October that she wanted to meet any potential romantic partners in public, because she wasn’t interested in dating anyone who didn’t want to be seen with a transgender woman. Cox also revealed that she has a series of questions she asks herself when she begins seeing someone, including, "Am I attracted to the person, does the person treat me well and make me feel good about myself, does it feel safe?"
In an interview with Vulture that also occurred in October 2018, Cox explained that she thinks it’s important for men who date trans women to be allies to their romantic partners. "By having sex with trans women secretly, so many of those men fail to relinquish any of that power, or be critical of those systems that oppress trans people," Cox told the outlet. "It would be nice if some of the men who sleep with trans women would actually speak out about the oppression of trans women."
While Cox doesn’t often share much about her love life publicly, it’s clear that her romance with Draper has been incredibly inspiring and important to the trans community — and to Cox herself — and it’s admirable that even in the midst of personal heartbreak, Cox has decided to focus her attention on finding the positive in the situation.
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