What birthday gift do you give the person you're unofficially dating?

So you’re seeing someone. Not just in zesty, kaleidoscopic visions that appear while you sleep… this time it’s a real lifeform.

They’re made of hair, blood, guts and the sweetest of butts. The human aspect is cool and all, but humans do tend to have a particular date they arrived on earth. And this presents a quandary, or an opportunity. What do you give them for their birthday?

Things are new. You’re only just getting to know them, but you don’t want to give them an underwhelming pressie, and you certainly don’t want to give something OTT that will have them phoning the police.

Relationship coach Laura Yates tells Metro.co.uk: ‘When a dating situation isn’t a ‘relationship’ yet or at least if that discussion hasn’t been had, it can be tricky to know if two people are on the same page about the trajectory of where it’s going.

‘So best to keep these occasions like birthdays fun, light-hearted and low key!’

You heard her. Be cool.

Here are some tips from the experts on how to survive your unofficial flame’s special day.

Tickets to their heart

‘Treat your date to some tickets to something fun and exciting that you can enjoy together. Shared experiences help to build connection and a sense of togetherness in your relationship,’ love coach Vicki Pavitt tells us.

So if you like them, give a gift which means they’ll have to hang out with you. Tickets to a comedy night, musical, food festival or just the movies are a relaxed way of saying: I like you, but I’m not imagining what our babies would look like.

If you happen to be broke, you can also create DIY tickets offering a home-cooked dinner/a hug.

Speaking of DIY…

‘Don’t let the idea of gift giving overwhelm you, start small and keep it simple and inexpensive at first. Save the big ticket items for when you are more emotionally invested in the relationship,’ Vicki says.

Use this opportunity to show them that you care, and to exhibit your creative skills in a simple way. Knit a beanie, snap some nude polaroids and bind them together with your hair, or even spend the weekend crafting a blue egg because the internet told you to.

An opportunity to learn

Plan something to enlighten your chosen, but not yet betrothed, human.

Laura Yates says: ‘In this situation, it’s nice to show acknowledgement of the birthday in some way but to keep it light and low-key. This could be something like suggesting you do something fun or a bit different as a date.’

Doing something different means you can test your compatibility with a problem-solving activity. It’s their special day, but it’s also special because you now get to learn what the heck they’re really made of. Opt for an escape room, laser tag session, paintball battle, fitness class or even a cooking lesson.

Travel goods

If you’ve caught them day-dreaming about a travel destination, find a guidebook for that location or a travel related item like a vintage world map or a top-of-the-line portable charger. It’ll also delicately hint you’d like to be their adventure buddy.

Their desired booze

You probably learned their drink of choice on the first date. So go on, be a lazy turd, but a generous one.

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